Based on my entries to this point, you may be getting a skewed idea of our program; you may think it’s all fun and games and sweetness and love, etc. But as with anything, what you put into it is what you’re going to get out of it, whether working from within “the box” or without. Today was a good reminder of that for me. Today we learned to make deadfall traps. These are traps are created by fitting together three notched sticks at various angles balanced against a heavy object such as a log which will theoretically fall on whatever you are trapping when it comes to get the bait you left in a strategic spot on one of the sticks. Simple, right? No? I’m afraid my difficulty explaining it mirrors the difficulty many have in creating a working deadfall trap. Suffice it to say, it’s a tricky project which takes patience and perseverance, neither of which I had this morning. This is the kind of day where in traditional school I might have spaced out, daydreamed, slumped in my chair, and been no worse off for it. It was the kind of day that I just didn’t want to be uncomfortable or challenged. As is not unusual at Wilderness Awareness School, however, it was cold and wet and the task at hand was challenging. What made it more challenging for me was the fact that this skill is one only to use in an extreme survival emergency, and is at other times illegal. So, I started off a bit grumpy, having little thoughts of “what’s the point of this?” and “I’m never going to need this skill so can’t I just sit by the fire and be comfortable?”. Unlike being a kid or an adult in a traditional institutional setting, there was nobody there who was going to make me do anything. Realizing this, I made a choice. I made a choice to be challenged and to learn this skill even if I might never use it. My brain hurt, I was cold and sore, and I sat there, carving and balancing and starting all over again and wondering if I should have taken a physics class…. and suddenly I realized I was enjoying myself. I was smiling and having fun and when I finally got that trap set and it worked like it was supposed to (in catching my hand) it was extremely satisfying. I had pushed the boundaries of my comfort zone a little farther and given myself a kick in the butt when I knew noone else would. It felt good, and I was proud of myself. So yes, plenty of fun and games and sweetness and love to be had here but it doesn’t always come easily. I know that there are bigger challenges ahead, such as building shelters in which we will spend the night (notice I didn’t say sleep). I just hope that the motivating force inside me will stick around through those times. Otherwise it’s going to be one long, cold, wet winter. (Note to self- buy some thick wool pants soon!)

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